Friday, December 25, 2009
*.* Merry Christmas! *.*
YOZ!!!!! It is the time of the year again!! IT is Christmas!!! the day that the Lord Jesus was borned to be among His people! Every one Merry Christmas!!! lol... IT is getting late so i will type more tmr! hehehe
Friday, November 06, 2009
*.* Friday is here!!! *.*
Ohayo! Time is so fast!!! Friday is here already! Finally! heheee... =.=" and i still have a pile of work to finish... *sigh*
I really hate accounting... Really... I have no mood to do accounts any longer...
I don't know why... but I really feel like suffering when I do something I don't like even if the pay is going to be super high... but sometimes I tell myself that I am here as a guest on Earth even if I earn alot but I don't like my job... then my stay here will really just be... >_<
haha...
I was feeling depress yesterday and I even asked God that if my desire, my dream isn't what He wants to give me... Please take that desire away... Cos in the Father's Love Letter, it stated that "Delight in me and I will give you the desire in your heart for it is I who give you those desires" Yes though it was a Letter formed by someone but it is all promises from the bible... so I take it as a promise from the LORD. But I don't know... I am so disheartened...
>_< looks like I will be having lots of blogs to update... haha.... ok... I think I will update it tonight ^_^
I need to update my another blog.. =.= before it is now for my "suffering" for the day to begin..
Thursday, October 29, 2009
*.* 2 days MC! *.*
こんばんは!
今晩は寒いですね!
>.<>_<>_<
yesterday morning i woke up with a swollen eye! and the reason for the swollen eye? the pimple below my eye was having infection and it was swollen so it affected my eyes.. and i went to work yesterday.. but the swollen eye made me want to sleep instead.. haha...
but today i decided not to go work.. reason being that the eye is still swollen.. and i might fall asleep at work too.. =.=" and also that i really want that pimple to heal soon! if not.. T_T >_< it is bad... hahaa...
anyway... i went to see the doctor.. and it totally costed a bomb! >_<>_< but it is still expense! T_T but I have no choice... hopefully i can claim it under medical expense in the company T_T...
the good thing is that i have 2 days of mc.. but i spend one day of mc doing crap! I mean doing nothing! >_<
Something happened today too... Dad's CPF dont have enough money to pay for the housing loan.. so now mom will need to pay for the house using more cash... i am very upset that Dad still dont know how to think... Very upset... i told mom that i'll help her but she said that i should save them up first.. so i will then... I know that in evey situation God will make a way...
I am also very frustrated at what i should do after i leave the current job... i hope that my demo works.... but i dont know... i cant tell the future right? >_<
erm... I dont know what to do... but to do my best in this demo.. and hopefully the pimple heals in time.. X_X
well... i am also making a new blog blog for some things... reflection on things i guess... hahaa.... oh well.... i will link them up... it is late... i need my sleep before the pimple get worst >_<
ja Oyasumi! Ashita mata!
*.* world so lost and dark *.*
Ohayo! yes... it is early in the morning at 8.35 =.=" yes! and it is none other than Monday blues.. yes... though my Monday to Friday are blues... are Monday is the worst blues of all... Reason? I bet everyone knows... who wanna go back to work or school after 2 days of break? lol...
>_< erm... as for me.... none of the day seems to be a break... well... actually Saturday and Sunday might be better... though I have classes on Sat and Sun. I kinda miss everything in sch though...
erm... >_< time is so fast... and with each day i really dont know what i am doing with my life...
I tried and tried to reach for my dreams but each time i try i am getting more and more depress... so what am i doing? what am i doing? what else should i do? I am really tired ne... X_X Really wanna just stop time and rest there... and be in my own pace... I am so sleeply and tired... every day... alright... X_X I better log off now before i run out of time ....>_<... i will continue to write at night... hopefully =.=" cos i always end up forgetting... or too involve in other stuff..
ja... komban mata
*.* Patience and never giving up? *.*
Hi... It has been 1 month and 3days? lol.. i was so tired becos of doing many things.. yup and in 1 month plus time, my japanese exam will be here =.=" *pray hard*
I am now having a slight headache too >_<
Headache of many things ne.. i have sent out my demo and things.. but there is still not reply.. i am so super super tired ne! >_< ... T_T I wanna slp... lol.. but *sigh* I still have to practise...
but no matter how hard i try nothing seems to be happening... *sigh*
I feel like just lying there forever.... 好累好累!
I need a break! >_< give me a break! why why why?!?!?!
what else should i do to achieve this dream....
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
*.* ... *.*
ohayo! >_< I totally have no idea what topic i should have for the post... =.=" it is really very hard to think of the topic... lol...
Ah.. the stupid computer defragment is super long! it is still at 1% =.=" I wonder what is happening to it =.=" it is like hanging there... =.="
oh well..
erm.... it is a time for worrying and wondering again.. it will be the company retreat next week and i am still thinking... lol...
my head is starting to hurt... and i wanted that time for break... oh well..
Today is Tuesday blues! yes.. since yesterday was the public holiday.. so the Monday blues is now Tuesday blues! lol... X_X ya... and tmr i will be having a whole day of training... i really hate audit.. i hope i am not being selected for the audit... if not the whole company award might be gone because fo me... X_X ...
*sigh* I wish that I can have my dream job soon ... but i still need to create a video.. =.=" and i doubt i can do it within this few days... =.=" lol... but i need to do it.. which is why i am preparing and practising these few days and hopefully i make no mistaken when recording.. i hate to re-record ... yes... i hate it cos i have to do it myself.. and the worst part is that you don't know when there will be another noise coming... =.=" lol...
Have been a counsellor and consultant yesterday! X_X ... stupid guys... X_X ...lol... *sigh* and in CR my friend still ask me if i believe Kangin didn't start a fight... and of cos i believe... unless SuJu made me not to believe them... but of cos... I believe SuJu... they are so sweet! lol.. <3 ... erm.. but i also believe that there are many idiot guys out there... i mean... at least 50% or more are idiots... =.=" I really do bite at this kind of situation.. maybe cos Esther (star star) and me are more 'heartless' as in if we do see this kind of situation we will surely end the whole thing... but of cos i don't know what i will really do yet.. as i dare not enter into all these things now as i still have!
Yeah! the defragment finally moved! by 3% =.=" ..... i think i better ask my bro to have me keep a look out on my comp.. but he will probably off my internet connections.. and i will probably bite them when i come home.. lol.... or maybe I should just defrag my comp next week if i am going to get an MC... haha... X_X
Thursday, September 17, 2009
*.* Ask, Seek and Knock *.*
こんばんは!!!
皆!元気ですか。
My day is just.. less than average... lol...
Tomorrow I still have to go to office to do the morning devotion before going off.. since it is my leave tomorrow! >_<
While planning for what to share for devotion, I show sometimes that God shows me!
In the past months, I was really stress about my dream.. both singing and japan scholarship stuff.. and God sent me this message in Luke-Seek and it shall be given... it is the same msg as in Matthew but i never know that it also appeared in Luke again.. well.. so now many ppl will know that i haven't finish really the bible.. and i admit.. i haven't and have not finish any book yet...
well back to this... a few days ago, i was very depress about my life.. my dream and my family .. and when my aunty called and when she prayed, she mentioned this verses again.. and yesterday were going through the past preach in church, i again came across this..
and I realised something...
Yes, we should always ask God. Cos God listen to our needs and desires.. and He will grant them. but there are also things we should do... we should also take our step out... God can grant our desires... but we need to step out to do it... if we don't how will dreams come true? and so actions is also needed...
then... also the other thing faith.. faith in everything you do...
alright i will update tmr.. i need to go slp now.. >_<
Saturday, September 12, 2009
*.* how great is my life? *.*
Konnichiwa!
It is 12.30pm now... but i am so so so tired... yesh.. lack of sleep...
I dislike it when mom always look at bad side of things... well i do too.. but she look at all the negative things about others.. well.. maybe in us... maybe me...
i sometimes wonder whether there are any good thing about me...
Studies? so what if i am one of the top students? there is always a higher mountain right?
Singing? =.=" ya... still no reply from the companies.. so how good can i be?
music? i just started my piano class ok..
work? i don't like my work plus i am always making mistakes
japanese class? i am really slacking now... due to tiredness as i need to work
script writing? ya... imagination only...
I know I know.. negative thoughts and the devil is doing his work again...
I am trying to think positively.. but what can i do? each time i wanna solve one problem the other pop out..
and each time i wish for a hope and miracle i waited and waited but it didn't come...
and each time something happened at home, I have to handle it all...
Since young ok!
Since young, whenever my parents had cold war, I am the middleman...
when my brothers and my mom had cold war, i am the middleman...
When my mom and me had an arugement, i have to be the one at fault
So where are all the burdens? on me ok...
of cos my mom is angry about all this things.. and i agree that i am the peacemaker... but they never realised that...
I know that God wants me to be patient as he has his own timing...
and He knows my desires.. He may say No now.. cos i am not grown up.. but He wants me to be patient... and the Yes will come in soon...
But LORD, i am so tired having to carry everything onto myself... i know i can carry everything to you. But Lord, i know that i will not see immediate effect.. therefore, i also need to do something before i can see your doings oh LORD.
LORD, what do you want me to do LORD?
Saturday, September 05, 2009
*.* life and its meaning? *.*
こんばんは!!
今日は悪い日だった!!!
ok... =.=" i think it is blur enough.. lol.. the 2 sentneces means "Good evening... today is a bad day"
BAD DAY!!!!
Yes... since the morning... Hector has been asking to lend him the money to either repair or buy a new psp... since his spoilt mysteriously (Apparently it is due to his long hours of playing)
I am so tired of his ways... he should learn to get things by achieving for it.. not to just ask for things and expect things to be given.
I don't even get what i want... i wanted to go for piano class since 12 years ago but i cant until now and i have to pay for it myself. the same goes for piano class... the most expensive gift i got was probably..let me see... a CD? other than the laptop... cos laptop is for sch which is why i need to buy it...
When even when i got the top 2nd position in my school for my Cambridge O level exams, my parents didn't really buy me anything, it was my uncle who gave me and my brothers sometimes. and like my uncle said when one do well others will celebrate.. but what did my brothers do?
All i want them to do is to do the right thing... is doing the right thing so hard? like studying before an exam? you can see Hector playing games when he should be studying for his exam the next day.. and his reason "I study just now le... already read through alot of times" and do you believe that i can read the whole pile of notes 5 to 10 times and still don't know how to do a question but for him he can just read 4 times?
maybe he is smart... but i don't wan him to repeat one module and mom have to pay for him...
he needs to achieve things not ask and he will get it easily.. yes ask and you will receive (as in Bible Matthew 7:7) but hard work also need to be place in...
Samuel too... the promise breaker.. "Jie I promise 5pm will reach home!" in the end 7pm then reach home..
and now he is having a headache again... and a severe one.... i hope that God can heal him fast
and mom.. i hope that mom can be more easy-going and letting go.. yes.. like what LaoBao (boss) said "parents are always good at bad things.. especially mom.. ask them to talk about good things of child (or husband) bad things just keep coming out like Window XP but when good points they will slow down to Window 1998 or older"
it is a good description... lol...
I really wanna thank Aunty Maureen for calling just now.. i guess cos i was crying and God send Aunty to call me and pray for me. Lord please help me and increase my faith. and like your msg which always lead me when i was down esp these few passage "ask and it will be given, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened"; "pray and never give up", "therefore seek first his kingdom and his righteousnes and all these will be given to you as well"....
Thanks Lord for reminding me...
>_< lol.. i need to recall what i have typed cos i went down to buy things for my brother who is having a headache.. and i will be having a headache soon.. well i am having a headache already.. lol...
alright.. i am going to bed... arigatou for looking at this! <3 *hugz*
Thursday, September 03, 2009
*.* life and its meaning? *.*
Kombanwa! ya it is me again... =.=" babo me.. it is my blog right... other then me who else will write here.. =.="
it has been a day of thinking.. really.. well.. the whole 2 weeks have been a reflection week for me... thinking and thinking.. depressing and depressing... X_X when will it even stop ne?
Let's see... i have been thinking what am i doing with my life.. ppl said that they have been living their dreams for half of their lives or even up till now of their lives.. but for me.. i feel that i am not living life as i wanted it to be...
Been having this music dream since i was 8 or 9.. so ya.. the dream has been with me for up till at least 12 years... i always wanted to give up but somehow or rather God put the dream back into me and i try again.. but after so many times there is still no result so what should i do? just give up? I have asked for opinions and recorded it over and over and over again.. and i am so frustrated.. yes frustrated at self and also God..
I also felt that life isn't what i want it to be.. and it isn't as nice.. Family problems... others can have a wonderful family, loving parents.. or at least parents who they don't have to worry about.. i always have to worry about what happened at home, whether anything will happen and how to make peace between my parents and sometimes even my brothers...
what is my life?
and i am not doing the things that i want.. i wan my dream... but what i am doing now is what others think as good! but to me.. i am like a robot listening and waiting to be commend... yes.. i have my own opinion.. but who will listen.. when i said i wanna do something they will ask "do you think it is practical? what is ur future like that?" so what am i suppose to do? I can't reach for my own dreams.. i have to be the peacemaker, i have to over look everything... i am so tired... tired...
And now just when i really wanna take a step forward to my dreams, my prayers and cries were not answered... so what can i do???
Wednesday, September 02, 2009
*.* miracles *.*
Ohayo! It is 8.20am... a few more minutes before i am leaving for work... today there will be meeting for the whole morning... well.. it isn't really like meeting in other companies... but i still don't really like it .. though it helps me to get away from the boredom of my work... i am kinda living like a zombie now... no emotions or feelings at work nor at home... many things have been happening especially in period like this...
Dad had make many empty promises and was caught by mom again.. so now mom and him are not on talking terms... ya... mom had been avoiding him and not cooking... but what can i do?
my dreams... still no answer yet... and i realised something... I believe in miracle... but i don't think that miracle will ever happen to me... i have tried for the 3rd time.. and i am so tired already... and my work now.. i just wanna quit it... i totally feel that my life isn't getting anywhere.. and i am so tired and so sick of everything... yes everything.... I wanted a miracle to happen.. i want my dream job.. yes i know that my dream job will be tough.. but i wanna do it... but there isnt a miracle happening? why... i felt that my life is so tiring and has no meaning to it... i know that everyone on earth is here for something... but me? everything i do and i want has never been achieve... don't tell me that my sch results are good... so what if my sch results are good? I hate accounts.. i hate my life? i don't know... i am tired... everyday i am looking forward to an answer from my dream job... but there isn't... everyday i just lived like a zombie like nothing will happen.. no hopes no dreams... i have hoped ... but now i feel that miracles will not happen... and dreams will nv be achieve.. cos miracles will not happen on me... though i have asked God to include my faith and to grant me that miracle.. but i don't think any will happen to me
*.* SENT! *.*
>_< ohayo!!!! It is an early early morning and i am super tired... i have never never been so so tired before... chotto matte! >_< on second thoughts.. as long as it is working i am so tired right? lol... but today it is more tiring than the other working days....
I didn't off the alarm within 20 secs =.=" usually i will off it when it starts ringing but this time the alarm (which is the MP3 She's Gone by super junior) has already started Kyuhyun's singing =.=" lol....
Alright... Monday blues... =.=" I will talk about more Monday blues when I get home at night... but now.. I don't wanna think about it.. especially since there will be a fire drill later.. which makes me don't wanna think about it even more =.="
Yesterday! Yesterday night I finally sent my demo after a long long long discussion with my friends... minna! sumimasen ne! X_X really.. I really took a long long long long time to decide on which I should pick after all I recorded 5.. and before that I think I recorded another 5 of the same songs and 6 of different songs... Arigatou ne minna! and I just remembered i forgot to change the recording name from Yishidemeihao trial 3 to yi shi de mei hao =.=" opps.... but i can't resend ne X_X ... oh no! >_<
Now i am stress that i will fail again X_X ... haisssh.. like i had in the past... i mean past few months.. recording tiring trying over and over again.. may God help me this round.... yup and I have been praying >_<
and I really hope Miracle will happen like in this song which I heard at work (I mention work again =.=" *blues*)
全能的神你能力无限
有了你万事都有可能
纵使大山在眼前
你也能够挪去
在你绝对没有难成事
主每当我软弱无力
你的恩典够我用
只要我能够相信
奇迹-必会降临
不靠才能 不靠勢力
依靠圣灵的能力
只要我全心呼求
奇迹-必会-降临
只要坚定来宣告就有奇迹
坚定 相信就必会成就
May the Lord guide me in it... and when I pray, I believe and ask, May the Lord listen and help me.. ^_^
*.* unhealthy-ness *.*
Kombanwa!
A short one today... cos i will need to go sleep soon!!! lol
after reading my previous post i think many ppl (well.. Esther and Ayumi-chan are both shocked)
well.. when i read it at first i was shocked too... but my japanese class friend said that the rumor had been like that...
well.. so should i believe it or not.. lol...
well.... life has been very stressful these few weeks... 1st-reaching for my dream so i need to work hard which is stressful cos it is hard work... 2nd-my current job which i don't like... i don't like accounting.. but i took accounting in polytechnic.. so regretful.. it isn't my choice ok... 3rd-no support for my dreams... ok there are some support from my friends... but my family? i don't know... i don't even wanna tell them... cos they will definitely want me to do something like business again... which i don't like.. =.="
life is so stressful now that i am so unhealthy now... really.. like when i eat dinner especially.. even though i only drink milk but i feel like vomiting cos it isn't digesting? =.=
and my breathing too... seems so breathless.. though the haze is part of the problem...
>.< I am really so tend these days... i thought i better need a break... but i only have 10 days of leave until December... =.=" lol...
If i am doing something I like ... I will never be in this much stress... =.="
I really hate myself sometimes... why can't i do something i like... why... =.="
and when my relatives or parents asked "then why you take it in the first place" what do they want me to answer?
if i said i wanna sing-which i really do want... how will they respond? if i said i wanna go for singing class/game design class, they will say that it is not practical... >.<
so what can i do.. now i can only hope for my dreams to come true then hopefully i can really achieve what i want to do...
May the Lord help me.... for anything is possible in Him....
"Ask and you will receive, Seek and you will find, Knock and the door will be opened to you..." Matthew 7:7
*.* SHOCKED!!!!! *.*
This is something my friend sent me, though i don't know if it is true =.="
1. Violence
Once, the youngest member in a group went on stage with a mask. People revealed that he was seriously beaten up by the recording company the day before and his face was really in a bad condition. But still, he had to go on stage and tell the fans that he fell down in the bathroom. Another member from the same group had an injection before going on stage of their major concert. That was because the company hit him till he broke his bones, but it was impossible to cancel the concert, so he had to have that injection. And the concert wasn't like others, which is one show per day, but it was twice a day ~That was Shinhwa's Andy & Junjin
2. Money factor
There was a group in Korea who was famous in all of Asia. When they went to China, the fans there them loads of gifts. In the end, fans basically started giving food instead, because for them, food is the most important thing. While they were resting backstage, people saw them and the whole place was pretty messy with food packages all over. They don't usually get to eat nice food because of the irresponsible company. Most of the artists come as a group and after splitting the money, they're left with very little. And the money had to be used for investments in other performances. They take in thousands of young talents and train them for years. While training, the kids have to pay for their living and they won't get a single cent. The thing is, the chances of being an artists is lower than the chances of getting into Harvard University. As they grow a bit older, they'll probably be some background dancers with very little pay. ~ The group is H.O.T.
3. Andy
One of the most famous issues about him is the 'mask' issue. He was beaten by Lee Soo Man and had to wear a mask while performing. The company announce that he fell down in the bathroom and had 8 stitches. Secondly, Andy was forced to leave Shinhwa and return to America, but with the fans insisting and Shinhwa members' unity, he finally got to return to the group. Third incident, Andy took in 6 over headache pills and tried to take his own life. It happened on 22nd March, because he got rejected from a university and he wasn't allow to go out of Korea due to national service incident. Thankfully his family heard his cry and rushed him to the hospital. But when he reached the hospital, he insisted not to get treatment even after his mother & grandmother begging him. The doctor in the end had to do it with force.
4. JTL
After JTL left SM, even after they released 2 albums, they didn't get to perform properly. All their tight schedules were cancelled by SM, and their MVs weren't shown on TV at all. Jang Woohyuk from JTL once written in his diary that they were supposed to be very busy because it was the promotional season, but they were very free and doing nothing the whole day.
4. TVXQ/DBSK
Actually the incident where Changmin got beaten is true. Lee Sooman wanted a female artist to be famous, so he wanted her to have rumors with Changmin in order to get popular. Changmin rejected it sternly, and LSM got really mad, so he asked other people to beat him up. He even stood there saying,"As long as you don't beat him till death." Changmin returned to the hostel and the 4 of them were there. Jaejoong nearly cried seeing Changmin's bad condition. There was another time where Lee Sooman forced Changmin to work 3 days 3 nights without rest. He got a fever as high as 38 degree celcius the next day and he didn't tell anyone about it. Lee Sooman insisted him to perform, and on the 3rd day, he fainted. The 4 of them cried. Another time where Yunho & Jaejoong got beaten by LSM and it was really terrible, Changmin kneeled down crying and begging LSM to stop beating the guys. Yoochun cried on stage once and nearly got beaten up by LSM but he got saved by Kim Dongwan as he asked the 4 of them to stay close to Yoochun to protect him. Jaejoong got beaten once till his mouth was bleeding but he had to say that he fell down accidentally. Changmin once said that the reason why he was beaten by LSM and why he was always kneeling is to beg for the rest. LSM wanted to kick 1 of the members out but Changmin insisted that if he really have to kick one of them out, he would leave as well. In Changmin's drama, Snow Flower, he was supposed to film a "bed scene" with the female lead, Go Ara. As Changmin wasn't experienced enough, (even he had not kissed before) he insisted not to film that particular scene. Lee Soo Man was very angry and he immidiately slapped Changmin really really hard when they are on the set in front of everyone because he wanted Changmin to film it but still, Changmin continued to reject that scene so, the directors had no choice but to remove that scene.
5. Shinhwa
It was said that in order for Shinhwa to leave SM but still keeping the name, Eric's family paid a huge sum of money for that. Shinhwa need to pay SM for being able to keep their name and continue singing their old songs and even now, SM sometimes lets this current singers, like Super Junior sing Shinhwa’s old songs.
Random Facts
**When Boa was still in training, SM's owner, Lee Soo Man, made H.O.T and Shinhwa members teach her how to dance, sing. (this was about summer of 2000) HOT and Shinhwa members were so busy with their own schedules, yet they still had to teach her. When Boa got impatient or was frustrated.....the members would too......but Lee Soo Man always favored Boa, and the extreme was that Lee Soo Man would hit (physically) the H.O.T and Shinhwa members
**Lee Soo Man favored the most popular out of the group. For ex. H.O.T Lee Soo Man asked Kangta and HeeJun secretly to re-sign with SM, before even their "H.O.T" contract ended. And kangta and heejun did, while leaving out the other 3 members.
**Lee Soo Man also under paid H.O.T. When H.O.T broke up (in May of 2001) there were news of how much they were paid in 4 years and 8 months (since HOT debuted in Sept. 1996) and it was damn surprising. I remember Woo Hyuk made about 54,000US per year which really is not alot, if you are a singer. Kangta and HeeJun made a lil bit more than that. And Jaewon made the least.
** DBSK rotation thing, so that was stupid move again made by Lee Soo Man.
**SM did not want to hire composers and writers, since they wanna save money, so made H.O.T members wrote their own music by the 3rd album. So in every way SM was trying to make the most money outta these groups, while spending the least on them.
**The stars don't get paid as much as many think they do. Like when you see a headline for example "BoA makes 80 Billion" or whatever, it's not entirely true. She doesn't even get 5% of the profit. None of it: the CF, concert, etc. It goes to SM and they use it to pay off other stuff.
** The rumors about singers in SM getting beat is true. Shinhwa and H.O.T are definitely two groups that were mistreated. DBSK were probably mistreated prior to their debut, when they were in training. They do this to ensure that these singers will become a big sucess by training them to make no mistakes. I think that's just sad.
**Lee soo man hits singers with BASEBALL BATS AND GOLF CLUBS!!!!
LSM made DBSG go on water diet, You know it mean that you lose weight by not eating ANYTHING and only drink water to keep you alive and walking,
**SM was training Shinhwa when they decided to just release HOT (an alternate band)and let them be a flop. I hear that Shinhwa's CD was postponed as HOT surprisingly enjoyed their success. When the success of their CDs died (although not by much), SM decided to sign the most popular members to make some profit but gave up on the whole "great success" thing. Then they released Shinhwa.
** SM singers only get 1% per cd, while all other gasoos get 17% - source – TIME MAGAZINE
*.* sick *.*
hihi...
all of the total i feel so sick.. ya... i guess my dad's friend is right... though he just look at me and he could tell that i am in loads of stress... of cos... who won't? lol.. well... my mom said that whatever we do there will always be stress... well.. true... but...
now i am doing something which i don't like so the stress is double i think.. how to i relax when i try to keep on my mind on thinking how i should get out of the work =.="
i wish that i can really relax.. lol.. i think i really need some real good rest... as soon as the date for audition or November comes... i think i will quit >_<.. lol.. cos i really cant handle it anymore.. =.="